I don't have a job. I don't have an internship. I really don't have a lot of motivation. I am twenty-one and on my own for the first time. I'm scared out of my mind and I don't know what I want to do with my life after I graduate next year. So, instead of being productive, I'm eating day-old fried rice and wondering what the hell I'm supposed to do with myself this summer.
My boyfriend (with whom I'm living) has an internship. It's even a good one, one that he will probably get paid to continue working there even after the internship is up. He's basically rewriting a computer program that took an engineer with a doctoral degree six months of dedicated doctoral-type research to create and write. And my man's going to revamp it in six weeks. He's a legitimate genius and I love him to death. But he's going to be killing himself slaving over this program for the next five week because he's the highest type of over-achiever and a perfectionist.
What have I done while he's been working with super computers for the National Science Foundation? Well...There's the motorcycle helmet I decoupaged. I learned how to do the much acclaimed Pinterest-sock bun (I must say, it's sort of changed my life). I decoupaged a bookcase. And a computer tower. And I've watched the entire season of Once Upon A Time (22 episodes in 4 days). I've filled out applications. I remade two t-shirts into tank tops and one into a rag-tag one sleeved top. I began planning an exercise program (and even went jogging three days in a row). I did the laundry and the dishes and cleaned the bathroom, the kitchen, and the living room. I had an interview at the Dollar Tree (one of the 15 places I've applied at so far.) I hung onto my phone for a week straight before I realized I wasn't going to get the job at the Dollar Tree. I make my boyfriend lunch (braunschweiger sandwiches, by the by. If you know what braunschweiger is, then you know how desperate I am for something to do.) I went the Colorado School of Mines (where my boyfriend's internship is) and begged the public relations librarian for a job (she said no).
And then I pin. Thank God I resisted the allure of Pinterest while I was still in school for the year, because I would have flat out failed my finals, via rejecting studying for pinning. And now I have my wedding and at least two others planned (who said you have to have only one reception anyway?), about 80 DIY projects begging to be done (too bad I have no materials) and a boyfriend who has to take my computer away from me in order to get attention. It's pathetic, I know, especially since I'll never wear the clothes I pin or try the recipes or obtain enough mason jars to do what all those crafty ladies think I can with them. But I feel like that's okay because I'm at least thinking about being productive. Which helps. I guess.
I will spend this weekend at my parent's house (a two hour drive from Golden) while my boyfriend drives a fire truck. I will bring him lunch and I will try to hang out at my parent's house like I did when I still lived there. They will pretend I've never left, and be overly peppy in an attempt to make me see that I really don't want to live with my boyfriend, but with them. We will eat dinner at six and at six-thirty my man will be off and I will spend the next five hours curled up on his parent's couch (They, by the way, are not so thrilled that he comes home to work every weekend). I will be home by 12:00 because my parents still think I'm 15. It will repeat.
This is my semi-adult life.
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